gue banget

Bad news... again

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 12:07:36 GMT

I got my third rejection today. From Purdue. It kinda make my day blue. Gosh. Well may be Purdue is not the best for me. My hope lies in UMass and Gatton. I hope wll be accepted in those two school.

Pak Toto said that if its meant to be then it will be happen no matter what. Nothing else I can do but praying. Bu Frances also said the same thing. She said that it lies in God's hand. Yes. They borh are right. Well, whatever happens, I know it is something that I can handle. It's all for my best. Wishing that everything will be beautiful in due time

Happy Birthday to ME

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 04:58:13 GMT

today I am officially 30. People say that life begins at 30 so I kinda wondering what lies ahead in my 30. Anyway I wish to have the same birthday gift as mba Mia's. Getting accepted in one of the three remaining schools.

Four days to go....

Fri, 27 Mar 2009 08:09:20 GMT

It's four day before my birth day. Still waiting for the news. About one week ago I got an information saying that two schools rejected my application. University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign and University of Kansas. There are three other schools, I hope I still can make it to Purdue. Or UMass at Amherst. This waiting period is killing me. I lost the interest to do anything, even my long debt, like research. Do I only making excuses? I think I do. Not to mention the seminar that seems going nowhere.

Hoping to get an acceptance letter for my upcoming bithday. I am going to be 30. Kim Sam Soon spend hers with Sam Shik... Who will I spend it with?

About 2 weeks from now there will be an election. The offices will be closed like 4 days. Some of my friends were asking if I would come home, but I don't think I will if I do't get any information about the school. I reall y hope I would have an acceptance letter by then.

resah...

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 06:14:32 GMT

Extension of Application Deadline: Applications and supplemental material for Fall 2009 admission will be accepted until March 16, 2009. >>> The announcement in the school website which makes me feels more restless. When the deadline is extended, it means that the announcement of admission will also be extended.

Waiting is the job I hate most, because when we are waiting for something, we can not focus on the task at hand. This is what happening to me right at this moment. I am waiting for the announcement of my school admittance. I hope I will get good news by my 30th birthday.

Gosh... malesnya kerja :(

so restless

Tue, 13 Jan 2009 04:48:59 GMT

It's the 13th day of 2009. A lot of thing remains uncertain. Thanks to my Fulbright candidacy, I manage to extend my contract to April 30th. Is it good news? I don't know. My journey to PhD is the same thing. I hope I will get through all the process in time and I will be in the states around this time of year in 2010.

I am the oldest of the three. I have two younger brother, aged 26 years old and 19 years old. Since I am the only girl among the three, most of the time it feels like I am the youngest. But lately, I do feel like I am the oldest. Being the oldest, there is some sort of tendency that my younger siblings will look up to me. What I've become will affect their being. I said before that lately I feel like I am the oldest. It is because my youngest brother is look up to me now. It happens since I started working in ITB. I t gave some sort of pressure to me, and I hate pressures. He was depressed when I told him that my contract will not be extended. Now with me going through these entire path to PhD, he put his hope and with on my shoulder again. I hope I can fulfil his hope and wish, so I will not disappoint him.

�. I was supposed to take GRE test next Thursday, but I haven't received any confirmation yet. This also makes me nervous. Whatever happens, I hope it's for my own goodness.

bingung... lagi

Tue, 30 Dec 2008 06:39:08 GMT

It is the last 2 days of my contract in SBM. S from DMSN said that his boss said that my contract is extended, but my own boss hasn't said anything. I have not received any notification from the human resources department either. S and B said that if you have not receive any notification, it means that your contract is extended. I had a chat about it with Mrs, F, she complained the same thing. She said that one month prior to the end of the contract, I should be receiving any notice. What a weird business school .
Anyway, I am planning to home tomorrow, if I could. It will be for five working days, if my contract is extended, and one month, if it is not. No matter what I am looking forward to say okaeri!!!

nervous

Sun, 07 Dec 2008 05:08:46 GMT

Last Friday, I had my second GMAT in Salemba. I was hoping that I could pass 600, but it turned out that I only scored 550 on this second try, 40 points increase from the last one. It's less than Simon's improvement (he got 50 points imrovement in his second try). I am very nervous for several reasons. The first, on the day of the test, my score was the lowest among the three who took the test that day. The other two got 680 and 650. The second thing that makes me very nervous is because other Aminef student who got 640 was also adviced to take the test for the second time. Eventhough pak Toto said that with that score there are schools willing to take me in, but I am still nervous and it's making me unable to sleeb for the last couple of days.

I believe that everything hapens for a reason. So is this. I am wondering, may be I got this score because my intention was bad. The bigger intention was to make my boss regret he's letting me go and I want to prove him that I could pass the bar he set for all the tutors, having GMAT score more than 600, compaing the need to achieving higher score to get in to better business school.

In this three days off, I was planning to catch up the work I should finished, making the research report and soing some grading. Since I don't have the quality sleep that I wanted, I could not make my mind to do what I planned.

I wonder what is goig to happen tommorrow. I believe that whatever happen is the best for me. If it was not the way I wanted to be, I hope God give me the strength to take what is the best for me. One wish for my 30th birthday next year... I get the school by then.

my oh my

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 10:05:04 GMT

Last Saturday, I went to a wedding reception of our Vice Dean's daughter. For the occassion, I was planning to use one of my kebayas. But It turned out, when I was trying to use them, none of them were fit me well. I had to push my stomach in so I can fit in. If I insisted to use it, then i would have to hold my breath all night long.

Finally, my cousin came to rescue. She lent me one of her cloth. Still tight, but it was better than my own cloth. When I look back my experience that night, I realized that I was so skinny back then, 5 years ago. I gained so much weight for the last five years. almost 20 kg. No wonder my mom was furious when she saw me.

I KNOW I CAN!!!!

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 06:20:13 GMT

The clock is ticking and I need to prepare myself to take another GMAT test by December 5, which is about three weeks from now. I planned to take a private course before the test, starting on Saturday, but I guess it's not the time yet. I went to the IEDUC today hoping that I can start the course on Saturday, but it turned out that there is no available tacher... yet. I hope I could get it soon because i've search other cram school but they do not offer GMAT. I think I should stick to my own study plan for now.

Pak Herlan said that the power of mind is marvelous. You can achieve something if you believe you can. Now, I should believe that I could be above 75 percentile on quantitative and verbal test. Everybody else is doing it, so why can't I!

Wishing with all my heart

Thu, 23 Oct 2008 09:43:26 GMT

Everything happens for a purpose. If I don't understand why I have to going through all this now, one day I will. I believe that it is all because He loves me and know what the best for me. What I thought was the best for me might not what He think is the best for me.

There is news after the shocking news, the news that pumps up my spirit. I got the scholarship!! Yokatta!! There still few next steps before I can continue my study, but I hope it will run very smoothly.

I live by the thought that whatever I am going through right this moment is the best for me. And right now, I hope that continuing my study in Purdue is the best for me. If it is not, I wish that God will give me the strength to take whatever it is the best for me.